Sorry for my inactivity, guys! I've been working on a lot of projects and working on a lack of sleep for that matter.
I promise I'll be back next month, bright and early when April starts :)
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
"You Are My Company"
The clock doesn’t strike
midnight,
—at all.
It just ticks
and ticks
until the hour
touches
twelve
and ticks again
some more.
I lie in bed
and I wonder
about what thoughts
go through your
mind
when you cannot sleep,
and midnight has struck
once or twice
already.
Do you think
of me
with a dazing fog
of melodious words
that make you
fall in love?
Or do you
think
only of what
I say
and make everything
sound
so
to
your ears?
I think of you
and what it’d be like
to have you
in my arms,
—to be in your arms
to have you
hold me.
I love you.
My thoughts
of you
are my company
when I cannot sleep.
I’m quite sad
and restless,
in fact,
because I know
that you cannot
sleep
when you think
of me.
Though it may seem
flattering
to the ears,
given much thought,
it’s quite a depressing
story.
You cannot sleep
over the thoughts
you have of me.
I am your misery,
though I wish I
was your company.
--; December 11th, 2012
This is a story about the sad parts of love that every person has gone through. We go through these different stories but we all learn to feel the same things (kind of). We feel the insecurities that love brings from time to time, and this was meant to show that.
Tuesday, March 11, 2014
Just A Bit
I stared at the clock. Three hands moved, all attached at the center, yet they seemed to go nowhere. In my eyes, the second hand had continuously been moving back and forth. Every time I looked up to check the time, I could only find myself wondering if time had really frozen. My eyes hurt, and I couldn’t take it anymore. The silence, the emptiness: these were things I wished I’d never have to face.
Her face kept appearing in my head, as though my mind would refuse to let her leave. When did my own mind come to haunt me so much? When I placed my head down to close my eyes, the first thing I would see in the darkness was her face. She was smiling, but I knew that smile was a lie. She was crying right now. My mind wanted to comfort me, but no such result occurred. Guilt and anguish overflowed in my heart and I wanted to run to her to tell her how sorry I was. The thing is though, I can’t. I can’t face her, or her pained eyes. She was hurt, and I had hurt her. More than anything, I wish I could take the pain away, but if I had wanted to do that, I never should’ve brought the pain to her in the first place.
I stared at the clock, and for a moment, I felt relief because, at last, the second hand had left the place it had been stuck at for hours. The relief quickly disappeared, however, and the second hand came to freeze this time around. I was left in an infinite loop of wondering why it would not move. Had I been going insane? Is this what guilt does to a person?
Suddenly, there was a knock on my door. I stared at the clock one more time, and it seemed to have finally begun to move normally. The second hand kept going in a circular motion, making the minute hand move after it and the hour hand after that. There was another knock on my door, and I realized it was the knocking that drew me back into reality.
As I opened the door, I saw her face again. Her eyes were bloodshot, and her lips were pale. She looked up at me and gave me a small smile, almost as though to tell me that I was forgiven.
There was a silence between us, and I could have never been happier to see her angelic face. The face with the beautiful brown eyes that seemed to gleam brighter than the sun. The eyes that were always hidden under her cherry blossom scented black hair. She was the definition of heaven in my eyes, with feathers gracing her path every step she took.
"…can I come in?" she asked me, with a quiet voice filled with tension.
I looked around confused for a moment, until I finally noticed that we were still standing at my doorway. Quickly, I moved out of the way and opened the door for her to walk in. As she walked past me, I could help but to find myself searching for her scent. It must have been the oddest thing for me to start longing for, but I had missed her and the warmth of her skin pressed upon mine.
By the time I turned around, she was already seated on the sofa of mine. Her hands were on her lap and she looked around my living room.
"Is anyone else home today?" she asked me, with much nervousness.
It took me a while to find my voice, but I managed to say, “oh, uh…no. No one is home today.”
I suddenly noticed an error in my response, and quickly, I panicked to make up for it. “I-I mean, I’m home but no one else is.”
Her right eyebrow raised and she managed a smile on her face. I made her smile.
"You’re being so silly, Erik," she giggled. The sound of her happiness could only be described as soft music to my ears.
I suppose the way I say all of these things make me seem a little insane, but it’s how I hear them. She was my angel, the one who glowed with light everywhere she went.
"I’m…I’m just a little nervous," I told her. I found myself scratching the back of my head, and taking every chance to avoid her eyes.
A few seconds passed and there was silence again. I was standing a few feet away from her, standing like an idiot, trying my best not to stare at her. Eventually, she was the one who wound up approaching me. Her footsteps were lighter than air, almost making it look as though she were floating. Angels are too precious to touch ground, so I suppose that would make sense.
"Erik…," she began. She was now standing in front of me, well past the limits of personal space, but I did not mind. I was happy that she stood in front of me. Her brown eyes seemed to glow even though there was no source of light in my living room on.
I was silent, like an idiot once more.
"Erik…," she repeated. Her brown eyes stared into mine, and I felt a shudder. I couldn’t help myself as I found my gaze wander from her eyes and down to her lips. Her lips looked soft, and I could smell her at last. Her sweet aroma surrounded me and I was immediately lost in the moment.
"…I wanted to tell you something, Erik…," she continued. Her lips creatively shaped every word spoken, and I wanted to kiss them. I wanted to wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her closer to me, and I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to make her feel breathless, and I wanted her to understand my feelings. But, that was something I could not do. Those were actions that made her cry, and caused her to run out. They scared her, so I could not do that. I couldn’t make her be afraid anymore. I distracted my mind from thinking of her even though she stood in front of me. Her small frame never made my eyes want to turn away, but I had to. I had to focus just on her eyes, and make myself not see the glow.
"…what is it, Silver?" I finally responded.
She looked at me with worried eyes, and bit her lips. I became entranced once more from the sight of her expression. She was absolutely adorable, and it became harder to resist the temptation. But, I had to resist. She did not love me, not yet, and my impulsive feelings made her run, scared.
I felt a stinging pain in my chest as I thought those words. She did not love me. The girl I have loved for so long has found herself unable to reciprocate my feelings, not to the same extent. “Not yet,” she’d always say to me, “but soon.” I’ve been waiting for the day that “soon” would finally arrive. My hope vanished like a breeze of wind, coming in for a moment, giving me the relief and pleasure before disappearing and leaving me longing for it even more.
"—you," she said.
I broke out from my thought and realized I didn’t hear what she had said. When my eyes focused on her face once more, I noticed her pale complexion gaining a little bit of pink. She was blushing, and I did not understand why.
"…what?" I said, automatically intrigued by her expression.
Silver bit her bottom lip once again, and her eyes looked up at me. She opened her mouth for a moment, and I felt the breeze of wind again. Her lips formed shapes and I could not make word of the sounds she made. I didn’t understand why. I didn’t understand how it could have been.
When did this happen?
--; September 6th, 2012
YES. IT'S RECIPROCATED LOVE. YES. IT IS. SEE? I'M NOT ALL THAT CRUEL. I give my characters happy moments...every now and again...
For those who haven't noticed, I really like writing in the perspective of a male character (don't ask why—I don't know).
But yeah...this is real old. Haha.
Also, I have no idea where the title came from...this was originally a story I wrote to replace a journal entry and I used this title to show that I was going back into writing "just a bit". Yup.
But I guess you can also use it to show that she was reciprocating his feelings..."just a bit".
Hahaha. My boyfriend would have a field day with this commentary. He loves the whole saying the title of a story in a story (though this isn't technically the inside of the story).
Her face kept appearing in my head, as though my mind would refuse to let her leave. When did my own mind come to haunt me so much? When I placed my head down to close my eyes, the first thing I would see in the darkness was her face. She was smiling, but I knew that smile was a lie. She was crying right now. My mind wanted to comfort me, but no such result occurred. Guilt and anguish overflowed in my heart and I wanted to run to her to tell her how sorry I was. The thing is though, I can’t. I can’t face her, or her pained eyes. She was hurt, and I had hurt her. More than anything, I wish I could take the pain away, but if I had wanted to do that, I never should’ve brought the pain to her in the first place.
I stared at the clock, and for a moment, I felt relief because, at last, the second hand had left the place it had been stuck at for hours. The relief quickly disappeared, however, and the second hand came to freeze this time around. I was left in an infinite loop of wondering why it would not move. Had I been going insane? Is this what guilt does to a person?
Suddenly, there was a knock on my door. I stared at the clock one more time, and it seemed to have finally begun to move normally. The second hand kept going in a circular motion, making the minute hand move after it and the hour hand after that. There was another knock on my door, and I realized it was the knocking that drew me back into reality.
As I opened the door, I saw her face again. Her eyes were bloodshot, and her lips were pale. She looked up at me and gave me a small smile, almost as though to tell me that I was forgiven.
There was a silence between us, and I could have never been happier to see her angelic face. The face with the beautiful brown eyes that seemed to gleam brighter than the sun. The eyes that were always hidden under her cherry blossom scented black hair. She was the definition of heaven in my eyes, with feathers gracing her path every step she took.
"…can I come in?" she asked me, with a quiet voice filled with tension.
I looked around confused for a moment, until I finally noticed that we were still standing at my doorway. Quickly, I moved out of the way and opened the door for her to walk in. As she walked past me, I could help but to find myself searching for her scent. It must have been the oddest thing for me to start longing for, but I had missed her and the warmth of her skin pressed upon mine.
By the time I turned around, she was already seated on the sofa of mine. Her hands were on her lap and she looked around my living room.
"Is anyone else home today?" she asked me, with much nervousness.
It took me a while to find my voice, but I managed to say, “oh, uh…no. No one is home today.”
I suddenly noticed an error in my response, and quickly, I panicked to make up for it. “I-I mean, I’m home but no one else is.”
Her right eyebrow raised and she managed a smile on her face. I made her smile.
"You’re being so silly, Erik," she giggled. The sound of her happiness could only be described as soft music to my ears.
I suppose the way I say all of these things make me seem a little insane, but it’s how I hear them. She was my angel, the one who glowed with light everywhere she went.
"I’m…I’m just a little nervous," I told her. I found myself scratching the back of my head, and taking every chance to avoid her eyes.
A few seconds passed and there was silence again. I was standing a few feet away from her, standing like an idiot, trying my best not to stare at her. Eventually, she was the one who wound up approaching me. Her footsteps were lighter than air, almost making it look as though she were floating. Angels are too precious to touch ground, so I suppose that would make sense.
"Erik…," she began. She was now standing in front of me, well past the limits of personal space, but I did not mind. I was happy that she stood in front of me. Her brown eyes seemed to glow even though there was no source of light in my living room on.
I was silent, like an idiot once more.
"Erik…," she repeated. Her brown eyes stared into mine, and I felt a shudder. I couldn’t help myself as I found my gaze wander from her eyes and down to her lips. Her lips looked soft, and I could smell her at last. Her sweet aroma surrounded me and I was immediately lost in the moment.
"…I wanted to tell you something, Erik…," she continued. Her lips creatively shaped every word spoken, and I wanted to kiss them. I wanted to wrap my arms around her waist, pulling her closer to me, and I wanted to kiss her. I wanted to make her feel breathless, and I wanted her to understand my feelings. But, that was something I could not do. Those were actions that made her cry, and caused her to run out. They scared her, so I could not do that. I couldn’t make her be afraid anymore. I distracted my mind from thinking of her even though she stood in front of me. Her small frame never made my eyes want to turn away, but I had to. I had to focus just on her eyes, and make myself not see the glow.
"…what is it, Silver?" I finally responded.
She looked at me with worried eyes, and bit her lips. I became entranced once more from the sight of her expression. She was absolutely adorable, and it became harder to resist the temptation. But, I had to resist. She did not love me, not yet, and my impulsive feelings made her run, scared.
I felt a stinging pain in my chest as I thought those words. She did not love me. The girl I have loved for so long has found herself unable to reciprocate my feelings, not to the same extent. “Not yet,” she’d always say to me, “but soon.” I’ve been waiting for the day that “soon” would finally arrive. My hope vanished like a breeze of wind, coming in for a moment, giving me the relief and pleasure before disappearing and leaving me longing for it even more.
"—you," she said.
I broke out from my thought and realized I didn’t hear what she had said. When my eyes focused on her face once more, I noticed her pale complexion gaining a little bit of pink. She was blushing, and I did not understand why.
"…what?" I said, automatically intrigued by her expression.
Silver bit her bottom lip once again, and her eyes looked up at me. She opened her mouth for a moment, and I felt the breeze of wind again. Her lips formed shapes and I could not make word of the sounds she made. I didn’t understand why. I didn’t understand how it could have been.
When did this happen?
--; September 6th, 2012
YES. IT'S RECIPROCATED LOVE. YES. IT IS. SEE? I'M NOT ALL THAT CRUEL. I give my characters happy moments...every now and again...
For those who haven't noticed, I really like writing in the perspective of a male character (don't ask why—I don't know).
But yeah...this is real old. Haha.
Also, I have no idea where the title came from...this was originally a story I wrote to replace a journal entry and I used this title to show that I was going back into writing "just a bit". Yup.
But I guess you can also use it to show that she was reciprocating his feelings..."just a bit".
Hahaha. My boyfriend would have a field day with this commentary. He loves the whole saying the title of a story in a story (though this isn't technically the inside of the story).
Monday, March 10, 2014
"The Failings of Love"
I lie in bed
and wonder
if I could become
your guilty pleasure
your midnight bliss.
Because you have become mine.
I think of us
in the middle
of the night
when I can no longer sleep.
It has become
my comfort zone.
You are my peace.
But because I cannot be yours,
I suffer.
I offer you
no tranquil thoughts.
I rage and I bicker.
I leave all parts
of sanity
lying in the dust.
You are my calmness,
but I am your calamity.
We are as different
as day and night,
though we share the same sky
the same earth.
You stay up and cry over me.
You dream of me in peace.
I stay up and smile over you.
I dream of you in pieces.
You are mine
and I am yours,
but we are not
each other’s.
--; December 11th, 2012
Love isn't perfect.
and wonder
if I could become
your guilty pleasure
your midnight bliss.
Because you have become mine.
I think of us
in the middle
of the night
when I can no longer sleep.
It has become
my comfort zone.
You are my peace.
But because I cannot be yours,
I suffer.
I offer you
no tranquil thoughts.
I rage and I bicker.
I leave all parts
of sanity
lying in the dust.
You are my calmness,
but I am your calamity.
We are as different
as day and night,
though we share the same sky
the same earth.
You stay up and cry over me.
You dream of me in peace.
I stay up and smile over you.
I dream of you in pieces.
You are mine
and I am yours,
but we are not
each other’s.
--; December 11th, 2012
Love isn't perfect.
Sunday, March 9, 2014
Beyond What Memories Were
Leaves were steadily falling off the trees as I sat down on a park bench. There were many moments like these: ones where I spent my day worrying over nothing. The leaves gracefully touched the ground, as if they were parachuting down.
My eyes watched as each of the leaves painted a picture of vibrant colors on the ground, leaving the tree that stood in front of my vision bereft of any joy the once green leaves used to provide.
For a moment, and just a moment only, I sat there and thought not a single thing. The moment was slow and sudden, and filled with many visions of beauty. Within a few moments afterward, I found myself longing for something else. Actually, it wasn’t something, rather, it was someone.
Her smiles lit up the sky like fireworks on the Fourth of July. She was the essence of joy, and I could only find myself gaping at her beauty every time I saw her. How do feelings carry on for this long and yet, seem to reach nowhere?
Is it normal to feel insignificant in comparison to her? To me, it’s always been as though her needs were worldly, and mine were miniscule. Perhaps I augment her value too much so, but someone as lovely as her surely deserves it.
I watched as the leaves continued to fall, leaving the tree eventually bare. I wondered about the possibilities of what would happen if the leaves had feelings, and the tree felt pain. Did the leaves put on a courageous, yet dour front in attempt to make the tree stray away from its stolid personality? If that was to be true, I wonder if the leaves ever loved the tree that gave them a place to call home.
I think that the tree is an opulent being for it was never fully alone. Winters came along and left snow to hang on its branches. When spring arrived, there were many little buds coming to settle in their new homes. As summer came, they were fully grown. As fall began to arrive, the leaves were getting ready to leave, creating the start of a cyclic journey with the tree.
There is another reason why I believe the tree to be rich. It was rich from memories. Sometimes, there will be people who engrave their memories onto the tree. When that happens, the tree becomes symbolic and already different from the rest.
I picked myself off the bench I sat on and walked towards the tree. I knew of who I was missing. I had missed her very much, but her imperfections were no longer something I could touch.
I am no longer able to see her crooked, but warm smile. I am no longer able to feel the coldness of her breath as she spoke soft whispers to my ear. Her unkempt hair is no longer something I could poke fun at anymore.
As my fingers traced over the tree, I found myself praying for something to turn up. It had been years since the memory was engraved, but I was praying for its existence. There was an augment in my happiness when I found my fingers warily tracing over an outline I felt familiar with. As I took a closer look, I found myself struggling to see the imprint left on the tree, but it still existed. The memory was still alive and an intimation of a melancholic nostalgia hit me.
❤❣❤
“This tree is ours,” she said to me.
“No. This tree belongs to the park,” I corrected.
“No! This tree is ours, Brent,” she reiterated.
“…okay, okay. This can be “our” tree,” I said with an amused smile.
Perhaps she had seen the look on my face, but for whatever reason it truly was, she suddenly held an expression of embarrassment.
“…what?” she asked in a shy mannerism. Her lips closed slowly to form a pouting expression on her face. In that moment, I had fallen in love with her. It was the way her confidence could be projected so openly, and yet be taken apart in moments of embarrassment so quickly. Her pinked cheeks made her seem irresistibly cute in my perspective.
I found myself reaching for her face, ready to pull her closer to me, so that I could kiss her. It was just a moment between us, and for that moment, she did nothing but look into my eyes as though she were a puppy-dog.
A bigger smile cracked on my face, and I shook my head as I told her, “nothing. Nothing at all.”
“I declare this tree to be ours, and with this tree, we will have fortitude when facing heavy burdens,” she told me. Her hand caressed the bark of the tree; almost as though she thought it were a human being in pain and in need of adoration.
“Isn’t that a little odd?” I asked her. My arms wrapped around her waist as my chin found a resting spot on her shoulder. She held onto my hands, and even though her back faced me and her eyes were directed on the tree, I swore I felt as though I was the only thought going through her mind.
“Maybe, but this tree will live a lot longer than us. It will be our memory,” she said to me.
“Would you like to make it official, then?” I asked her, enabling her.
“…what do you mean?” she asked, obviously confused.
“Close your eyes,” I told her with a wicked smile.
She gave me a doubtful look and asked, “are you going to run away?”
I rolled my eyes at her and said, “of course not. Where would I run off to?”
A soft melody filled the silent air as she laughed and closed her eyes.
Tentatively, I used a somewhat sharpened rock on the dirt ground in order to carve our initials in a heart on the tree bark. It took several outlines in order to make it look etched in, but I managed before she got tired of closing her eyes in silence.
“Brent. Can I open them now?” she complained like a little child.
I laughed and told her, “yes. You may open them now.”
I saw a twinkle in her eyes as she placed them on the heart now engraved onto the tree bark. Her fingers ran over it, slowly, and she eventually came to turn towards me.
With the tree as our witness, we shared our first kiss underneath its blooming flowers. A breeze flew by at that moment, and a sweet fragrance surrounded the both of us. When our lips eventually parted, we were greeted by the sight of petals dancing around us in the air.
❤❣❤
My eyes caught a glimpse of other engravings on the same tree, and I felt my guise come apart. My calm and cool demeanor suddenly faded, and I was angry. These were memories that shouldn’t be made on our tree. Their existences adulterated the significance of our memory. I couldn’t stand that thought. Why did those other engravings exist? Why did they look so new and permanent, while ours looked as though it were being washed away in rain? It wasn’t fair. It was nowhere near fair.
Why did it feel as though the tree was gibing at my heart and my memories? It was painful.
I was near tears as I stood in front of the tree, hating its existence, until I recognized a scent. It was a sweet fragrance surrounding me, but I did not know why it had existed. The leaves were falling, and there were no flowers in bloom, yet I could smell it clearly.
A soft melody was played to my ears as I saw a twinkle in the air and felt a cold touch on my lips.
An echo of sound was made, telling me in the voice that I had longed to hear again, “this is our tree.”
--; September 16th, 2012
I wrote this for an English homework in junior year. I actually really like this story.
The title was based on the initials of the two characters' names. I like to be secretly symbolic like that. It's also to capture the feeling of the last section of the story.
(Spoiler alert: in case you didn't figure it out...yeah. She died. I killed her off. Sorry. Had to do it for the story.)
My eyes watched as each of the leaves painted a picture of vibrant colors on the ground, leaving the tree that stood in front of my vision bereft of any joy the once green leaves used to provide.
For a moment, and just a moment only, I sat there and thought not a single thing. The moment was slow and sudden, and filled with many visions of beauty. Within a few moments afterward, I found myself longing for something else. Actually, it wasn’t something, rather, it was someone.
Her smiles lit up the sky like fireworks on the Fourth of July. She was the essence of joy, and I could only find myself gaping at her beauty every time I saw her. How do feelings carry on for this long and yet, seem to reach nowhere?
Is it normal to feel insignificant in comparison to her? To me, it’s always been as though her needs were worldly, and mine were miniscule. Perhaps I augment her value too much so, but someone as lovely as her surely deserves it.
I watched as the leaves continued to fall, leaving the tree eventually bare. I wondered about the possibilities of what would happen if the leaves had feelings, and the tree felt pain. Did the leaves put on a courageous, yet dour front in attempt to make the tree stray away from its stolid personality? If that was to be true, I wonder if the leaves ever loved the tree that gave them a place to call home.
I think that the tree is an opulent being for it was never fully alone. Winters came along and left snow to hang on its branches. When spring arrived, there were many little buds coming to settle in their new homes. As summer came, they were fully grown. As fall began to arrive, the leaves were getting ready to leave, creating the start of a cyclic journey with the tree.
There is another reason why I believe the tree to be rich. It was rich from memories. Sometimes, there will be people who engrave their memories onto the tree. When that happens, the tree becomes symbolic and already different from the rest.
I picked myself off the bench I sat on and walked towards the tree. I knew of who I was missing. I had missed her very much, but her imperfections were no longer something I could touch.
I am no longer able to see her crooked, but warm smile. I am no longer able to feel the coldness of her breath as she spoke soft whispers to my ear. Her unkempt hair is no longer something I could poke fun at anymore.
As my fingers traced over the tree, I found myself praying for something to turn up. It had been years since the memory was engraved, but I was praying for its existence. There was an augment in my happiness when I found my fingers warily tracing over an outline I felt familiar with. As I took a closer look, I found myself struggling to see the imprint left on the tree, but it still existed. The memory was still alive and an intimation of a melancholic nostalgia hit me.
❤❣❤
“This tree is ours,” she said to me.
“No. This tree belongs to the park,” I corrected.
“No! This tree is ours, Brent,” she reiterated.
“…okay, okay. This can be “our” tree,” I said with an amused smile.
Perhaps she had seen the look on my face, but for whatever reason it truly was, she suddenly held an expression of embarrassment.
“…what?” she asked in a shy mannerism. Her lips closed slowly to form a pouting expression on her face. In that moment, I had fallen in love with her. It was the way her confidence could be projected so openly, and yet be taken apart in moments of embarrassment so quickly. Her pinked cheeks made her seem irresistibly cute in my perspective.
I found myself reaching for her face, ready to pull her closer to me, so that I could kiss her. It was just a moment between us, and for that moment, she did nothing but look into my eyes as though she were a puppy-dog.
A bigger smile cracked on my face, and I shook my head as I told her, “nothing. Nothing at all.”
“I declare this tree to be ours, and with this tree, we will have fortitude when facing heavy burdens,” she told me. Her hand caressed the bark of the tree; almost as though she thought it were a human being in pain and in need of adoration.
“Isn’t that a little odd?” I asked her. My arms wrapped around her waist as my chin found a resting spot on her shoulder. She held onto my hands, and even though her back faced me and her eyes were directed on the tree, I swore I felt as though I was the only thought going through her mind.
“Maybe, but this tree will live a lot longer than us. It will be our memory,” she said to me.
“Would you like to make it official, then?” I asked her, enabling her.
“…what do you mean?” she asked, obviously confused.
“Close your eyes,” I told her with a wicked smile.
She gave me a doubtful look and asked, “are you going to run away?”
I rolled my eyes at her and said, “of course not. Where would I run off to?”
A soft melody filled the silent air as she laughed and closed her eyes.
Tentatively, I used a somewhat sharpened rock on the dirt ground in order to carve our initials in a heart on the tree bark. It took several outlines in order to make it look etched in, but I managed before she got tired of closing her eyes in silence.
“Brent. Can I open them now?” she complained like a little child.
I laughed and told her, “yes. You may open them now.”
I saw a twinkle in her eyes as she placed them on the heart now engraved onto the tree bark. Her fingers ran over it, slowly, and she eventually came to turn towards me.
With the tree as our witness, we shared our first kiss underneath its blooming flowers. A breeze flew by at that moment, and a sweet fragrance surrounded the both of us. When our lips eventually parted, we were greeted by the sight of petals dancing around us in the air.
❤❣❤
My eyes caught a glimpse of other engravings on the same tree, and I felt my guise come apart. My calm and cool demeanor suddenly faded, and I was angry. These were memories that shouldn’t be made on our tree. Their existences adulterated the significance of our memory. I couldn’t stand that thought. Why did those other engravings exist? Why did they look so new and permanent, while ours looked as though it were being washed away in rain? It wasn’t fair. It was nowhere near fair.
Why did it feel as though the tree was gibing at my heart and my memories? It was painful.
I was near tears as I stood in front of the tree, hating its existence, until I recognized a scent. It was a sweet fragrance surrounding me, but I did not know why it had existed. The leaves were falling, and there were no flowers in bloom, yet I could smell it clearly.
A soft melody was played to my ears as I saw a twinkle in the air and felt a cold touch on my lips.
An echo of sound was made, telling me in the voice that I had longed to hear again, “this is our tree.”
--; September 16th, 2012
I wrote this for an English homework in junior year. I actually really like this story.
The title was based on the initials of the two characters' names. I like to be secretly symbolic like that. It's also to capture the feeling of the last section of the story.
(Spoiler alert: in case you didn't figure it out...yeah. She died. I killed her off. Sorry. Had to do it for the story.)
Saturday, March 8, 2014
"Are you In Love?"
To be in love
is to let love
swallow you whole,
as if a sea
of the masses
doesn’t exist
and cannot save you—
for you are
indeed
drowning.
If love is the ocean,
let your voice
be my safety
net,
and let me
never leave
the waters
that attempt
to drown me
because your
kindness
keeps me
safe
and warm.
--; December 11th, 2012
This may have been inspired by the poem "Devotion" by Robert Frost. Maybe.
But, it came about when ask.fm asked the question "What does it feel like to be in love?" (or something like that).
is to let love
swallow you whole,
as if a sea
of the masses
doesn’t exist
and cannot save you—
for you are
indeed
drowning.
If love is the ocean,
let your voice
be my safety
net,
and let me
never leave
the waters
that attempt
to drown me
because your
kindness
keeps me
safe
and warm.
--; December 11th, 2012
This may have been inspired by the poem "Devotion" by Robert Frost. Maybe.
But, it came about when ask.fm asked the question "What does it feel like to be in love?" (or something like that).
Friday, March 7, 2014
Impure Impulse
It was a shock, you know? The way it all happened between us—the way any of it happened, at all.
At some point, your eyes pierced through my heart—nearly breaking it apart. I had no idea where my mind disappeared to at that point, but it probably got lost putting together words to form a sentence intriguing enough for you to seek me out more often. Your eyes burned with a passion I could not express. Even as your eyes showed their natural hue to me—that colorless black—I still found their imprint lingering on my skin, and I sought to find out where it was that your eyes constantly scanned my body for, as though they burned with invisible flames. Never once did you turn around after you toyed with my mind; it was an enjoyment for you, wasn’t it? To have seen me squirm in your presence, and fluster with every move you made on me.
Did it please you to see that in me? See the girl you loved so dearly cower in defeat over your patronizing words—all because you could not accept that I was free to leave when I wished. You never seemed to understand that I wouldn’t have left even if the world reversed its spin and made me forget all about you; I would never forget this love, I promised you this. But you didn’t hear me when I said the most hopeful things, and chose to condemn me with the most hurtful words instead. My love still burned for you the way the sun had a passion for the earth. Maybe it wasn’t always reciprocated, but I knew from the day we met, I was the sun and you were the earth. I would feed you love, but it would never be enough to have you love me back the same.
Every passing moment, you would tear me apart. Your venomous words infected the wounds on my heart, until I could no longer breathe. I died. You killed my heart with your toxin, and in return, I only did what was right—my heart disappeared, but my mind finally returned. No love for you remained, only a passion left to burn. That passion was hatred—filled with so much angst. I thirsted for your blood, and fed on your cries. You broke me apart, so what was left for me to do? It was only fair—and I should say I was more than kind—to break your body apart, keeping intact your heart and mind.
--; February 15th, 2013
Twitch Plays Pokemon Crystal: Lazorgator's Recap Story, Part 2
A new day has always come to welcome a new set of obstacles. For us, it seemed as though there were nothing but obstacles in the new day.
After we defeated Silver, AJ led us to the outskirts of the town of Azalea. There, we met with an old man named Kurt. Admiral told us that he was famous in the region for his pokeball making skills. I considered collecting a pink apricorn for my master, so that Kurt could turn it into a Love Ball. I wanted my master to feel calm and happy and loved—it's been a long time since I heard him laugh. However, before I could even ask Admiral where I could find one, AJ led us down the Slowpoke Well. It was there that all our hardships started.
Men and women in black outfits distinguished by a red letter "R" covered the interior of the well. I found several Slowpokes with their tails missing—and I heard the ones who actually realized they were missing a tail wail in pain.
AJ attempted to fight them, but he suddenly stopped in his tracks and froze. Then, the unimaginable happened. He sent Prince to battle and within moments, I saw the little baby Togepi faint. Admiral's words echoed in my head "a leader must always watch out for their teammates" over and over until they nearly drove me insane. I was supposed to protect Prince no matter what, even if it was against my master's commands. I was supposed to have protected him. Because I didn't protect him, I was alone now. Admiral grew weak trying to keep us all from fainting. Brian, Oxxy, and BK went down with him shortly after. I was supposed to help Admiral protect everyone. I was supposed to. I was—...
"Lazor," my master called out to me.
I heard him speak, but why did his voice sound so far away?
I was incompetent, and because of my incompetence, everyone got hurt. Was he going to throw me away? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
My master knelt down and smiled at me. He placed his hand on my head and pat me in the way he always did, and I found all my anxiety disappear within a blink of an eye.
"It's time to battle," he said.
I nodded at him, and before I realized it, we already defeated all the suspicious looking people in the well. They called themselves Team Rocket, and it seemed as if they only fought to earn wealth. I couldn't believe it. For the sake of wealth, they found it reasonable to harm my fellow pokemon. I didn't understand the cruelty in the hearts of people.
But, I felt AJ pat my head again, as if to tell me that I did a good job, and I knew that no matter what happened, he would never be cruel—he'd always be my kind master...always understanding.
Kurt found us and led us out of the Slowpoke Well after he discovered that we defeated the infamous Team Rocket. He introduced himself as we walked to his home in Azalea Town, and gave my master a Lure Ball. Though I was content with the fact that my master got a gift from the kind pokeball master, I still wondered if it would be possible to give him a gift myself. I stared at Kurt and a pink apricorn that sat on a table; Kurt smiled at me as if he knew what I was thinking. Then he said, "come back anytime with an apricorn."
Without us having to lead him, AJ found the Azalea Town Gym and took us inside. It was a place full of bugs and a thick, humid air. I looked up at my master who only looked straight ahead at a boy with green hair. His name was Bugsy and, like Falkner at Violet City, he was the gym leader.
In the battle, my master sent Prince out once again and as I was about to intervene, Admiral stopped me.
"You have to let everyone carry their own," Admiral told me.
"But...Admiral...Prince...he's just a baby," I said, completely panicked.
"Yes. And one day, he will become a man," Admiral began to answer me. "He needs to learn how to fight. That is what AJ is teaching him."
I stood in silence as I watched Prince try a Metronome attack. His battle didn't last very long, but AJ held Prince in his arms afterward and smiled before giving me a nod.
It seemed as if everything was going to be okay, even if we were getting hurt.
With a Hive Badge in our hands, Admiral led us to the Illex Forest. AJ wasn't doing well, yet again, and we had to guide him through the walk.
We met a young man with a Farfetch'd that knew the move Cut. They were gathering charcoal wood in the forest, he managed to tell us before his Farfetch'd ran away. After we helped the young man find his Farfetch'd, he gave AJ HM01, which contained the move Cut. He wished us luck on our journey before disappearing into the darkness of the forest.
It was then that we decided to set up camp. The cat-and-mouse chase that occurred from trying to get to Farfetch'd tired AJ out a lot. He was sweating and shivering. His slurs of nonsense were coming back.
"...Up...down...up...up...left...," he began to say.
Admiral gathered some firewood in the forest after being taught the move Cut and lit us a campfire. There were only berries for us to eat, but we tried our best to feed our master. His condition was getting worse, and I didn't know how to help him.
I guess Admiral saw my fear, because he placed his hand on my head and pat it—the way AJ would—and said "everything will be okay."
Prince wobbled his way towards me and chirped very cheerily. He seemed completely oblivious to the situation, and I found myself a somewhat envious of the little kid.
"Hey, Lazor!" he exclaimed.
"Yeah?" I responded, very amused by him.
"Did you see me in battle today? Didja see me?!" he asked me as he jumped up and down on the grassy terrain of the forest.
I smiled at Prince the way that Admiral smiled at me, and said "yes. You were so brave and strong today."
Prince smiled and hugged me as tightly as he could before slowly falling asleep on my lap.
"What did I tell you?" Admiral said to me in a soft voice.
"...you were right," I told him with a smile.
We both looked up towards the sky again, and tried to see the stars between the leaves and branches of the trees. It was difficult, but it was still as beautiful as when we first looked up at them. Brian and Oxxy came back from their little adventure, bringing back a whole bunch of berries that we snacked on as we waited for AJ's fever to cool down.
When morning came, the campfire was replaced by ashes and smoke. I awoke to see AJ up and well, and I found myself so grateful that my master was cured of his fever.
We journeyed through the forest and wound up in Goldenrod City—an actual city. It had a game corner, famous buildings, and a gym. It was so full of life, and it was the first time I ever saw so many people in the same place at once. Everyone seemed so busy with their own agendas.
AJ found himself talking to a stranger in front of the Radio Tower; I think he wanted to win the Radio Card the man had up for display. It seemed to be an addition for the gadget he wore around his neck: his PokeGear.
Admiral guided us to the gym in the city after AJ finally won his card. I saw signs of his sickness coming back as he tried to complete the quiz the man gave out. I heard him cry out "up" and "down" as he looked at the questions, although they were very faint cries. I wanted to believe that I was just hearing things.
It was an easy victory for us to obtain the Plain Badge that Whitney gave out to competitors, though actually prying the badge off her hands was a difficult task. I don't know if it was because AJ was growing weaker with each passing moment or if she was actually just that strong, because the struggle to get the badge surely took much longer than the actual battle.
Upon exiting the gym, Admiral and I sat down at a bench while AJ took the rest of the party somewhere.
"Do you think AJ will die?" I asked Admiral after a brief moment of silence.
He took a deep breath and sat closer to me before trying to decide on how to respond.
But, I no longer needed an answer from him because I understood what he thought from the way he reacted.
"...it'll be okay, Lazor," Admiral told me.
I really wanted to believe it, so I closed my eyes and tried to engrave his words inside my head. However, just like that, I heard Chikorita's voice tell me "the end is coming" and I freaked out again.
It was like a bad omen of some sort—as if my mind was trying to forewarn me of something. I wish I paid attention to it more, but I didn't. Instead, I tried to find comfort in Admiral's voice and words.
"Did you know that in my family, I was known as VV?" Admiral told me. I think he was trying to distract me from my thoughts. I think he was trying to protect me the only ways he understood how: by teaching me to move along.
"...why?" I asked him.
"Because I was the fifth born of the fifth generation in my family tree," Admiral said to me with a smile.
I laughed because it was actually quite interesting.
A little while after, AJ returned with only an egg in his hands. Everyone else was gone, and I didn't understand. Nothing but negative thoughts managed to process itself in my head. I couldn't hear Admiral speak to me anymore. All I heard was Chikorita's voice, in a taunting manner, telling me that "the end is coming."
I wanted to ask my master "why?"
Did they do something wrong?
Did he abandon them?
...will he do the same to me?
--; March 6th, 2014
Welp. I hope you guys like the part two.
Yup. I attempted to foreshadow Admiral's eventual release. How'd I do? :D
Anyways, please look forward to part three and, once again, thank you to TVTropes.org for the Recap page and Pureownege75 for their reddit post.
Also, guys, check out kiyokon on tumblr~ She (I think it's a she because of her tumblr icon...so I hope I'm right...and if I'm wrong, I'm so sorry!) makes incredible fanart for TPP, including one piece that inspired the whole Admiral and Lazorgator father-son relationship for me.
So yeah~
After we defeated Silver, AJ led us to the outskirts of the town of Azalea. There, we met with an old man named Kurt. Admiral told us that he was famous in the region for his pokeball making skills. I considered collecting a pink apricorn for my master, so that Kurt could turn it into a Love Ball. I wanted my master to feel calm and happy and loved—it's been a long time since I heard him laugh. However, before I could even ask Admiral where I could find one, AJ led us down the Slowpoke Well. It was there that all our hardships started.
Men and women in black outfits distinguished by a red letter "R" covered the interior of the well. I found several Slowpokes with their tails missing—and I heard the ones who actually realized they were missing a tail wail in pain.
AJ attempted to fight them, but he suddenly stopped in his tracks and froze. Then, the unimaginable happened. He sent Prince to battle and within moments, I saw the little baby Togepi faint. Admiral's words echoed in my head "a leader must always watch out for their teammates" over and over until they nearly drove me insane. I was supposed to protect Prince no matter what, even if it was against my master's commands. I was supposed to have protected him. Because I didn't protect him, I was alone now. Admiral grew weak trying to keep us all from fainting. Brian, Oxxy, and BK went down with him shortly after. I was supposed to help Admiral protect everyone. I was supposed to. I was—...
"Lazor," my master called out to me.
I heard him speak, but why did his voice sound so far away?
I was incompetent, and because of my incompetence, everyone got hurt. Was he going to throw me away? I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
My master knelt down and smiled at me. He placed his hand on my head and pat me in the way he always did, and I found all my anxiety disappear within a blink of an eye.
"It's time to battle," he said.
I nodded at him, and before I realized it, we already defeated all the suspicious looking people in the well. They called themselves Team Rocket, and it seemed as if they only fought to earn wealth. I couldn't believe it. For the sake of wealth, they found it reasonable to harm my fellow pokemon. I didn't understand the cruelty in the hearts of people.
But, I felt AJ pat my head again, as if to tell me that I did a good job, and I knew that no matter what happened, he would never be cruel—he'd always be my kind master...always understanding.
Kurt found us and led us out of the Slowpoke Well after he discovered that we defeated the infamous Team Rocket. He introduced himself as we walked to his home in Azalea Town, and gave my master a Lure Ball. Though I was content with the fact that my master got a gift from the kind pokeball master, I still wondered if it would be possible to give him a gift myself. I stared at Kurt and a pink apricorn that sat on a table; Kurt smiled at me as if he knew what I was thinking. Then he said, "come back anytime with an apricorn."
Without us having to lead him, AJ found the Azalea Town Gym and took us inside. It was a place full of bugs and a thick, humid air. I looked up at my master who only looked straight ahead at a boy with green hair. His name was Bugsy and, like Falkner at Violet City, he was the gym leader.
In the battle, my master sent Prince out once again and as I was about to intervene, Admiral stopped me.
"You have to let everyone carry their own," Admiral told me.
"But...Admiral...Prince...he's just a baby," I said, completely panicked.
"Yes. And one day, he will become a man," Admiral began to answer me. "He needs to learn how to fight. That is what AJ is teaching him."
I stood in silence as I watched Prince try a Metronome attack. His battle didn't last very long, but AJ held Prince in his arms afterward and smiled before giving me a nod.
It seemed as if everything was going to be okay, even if we were getting hurt.
With a Hive Badge in our hands, Admiral led us to the Illex Forest. AJ wasn't doing well, yet again, and we had to guide him through the walk.
We met a young man with a Farfetch'd that knew the move Cut. They were gathering charcoal wood in the forest, he managed to tell us before his Farfetch'd ran away. After we helped the young man find his Farfetch'd, he gave AJ HM01, which contained the move Cut. He wished us luck on our journey before disappearing into the darkness of the forest.
It was then that we decided to set up camp. The cat-and-mouse chase that occurred from trying to get to Farfetch'd tired AJ out a lot. He was sweating and shivering. His slurs of nonsense were coming back.
"...Up...down...up...up...left...," he began to say.
Admiral gathered some firewood in the forest after being taught the move Cut and lit us a campfire. There were only berries for us to eat, but we tried our best to feed our master. His condition was getting worse, and I didn't know how to help him.
I guess Admiral saw my fear, because he placed his hand on my head and pat it—the way AJ would—and said "everything will be okay."
Prince wobbled his way towards me and chirped very cheerily. He seemed completely oblivious to the situation, and I found myself a somewhat envious of the little kid.
"Hey, Lazor!" he exclaimed.
"Yeah?" I responded, very amused by him.
"Did you see me in battle today? Didja see me?!" he asked me as he jumped up and down on the grassy terrain of the forest.
I smiled at Prince the way that Admiral smiled at me, and said "yes. You were so brave and strong today."
Prince smiled and hugged me as tightly as he could before slowly falling asleep on my lap.
"What did I tell you?" Admiral said to me in a soft voice.
"...you were right," I told him with a smile.
We both looked up towards the sky again, and tried to see the stars between the leaves and branches of the trees. It was difficult, but it was still as beautiful as when we first looked up at them. Brian and Oxxy came back from their little adventure, bringing back a whole bunch of berries that we snacked on as we waited for AJ's fever to cool down.
When morning came, the campfire was replaced by ashes and smoke. I awoke to see AJ up and well, and I found myself so grateful that my master was cured of his fever.
We journeyed through the forest and wound up in Goldenrod City—an actual city. It had a game corner, famous buildings, and a gym. It was so full of life, and it was the first time I ever saw so many people in the same place at once. Everyone seemed so busy with their own agendas.
AJ found himself talking to a stranger in front of the Radio Tower; I think he wanted to win the Radio Card the man had up for display. It seemed to be an addition for the gadget he wore around his neck: his PokeGear.
Admiral guided us to the gym in the city after AJ finally won his card. I saw signs of his sickness coming back as he tried to complete the quiz the man gave out. I heard him cry out "up" and "down" as he looked at the questions, although they were very faint cries. I wanted to believe that I was just hearing things.
It was an easy victory for us to obtain the Plain Badge that Whitney gave out to competitors, though actually prying the badge off her hands was a difficult task. I don't know if it was because AJ was growing weaker with each passing moment or if she was actually just that strong, because the struggle to get the badge surely took much longer than the actual battle.
Upon exiting the gym, Admiral and I sat down at a bench while AJ took the rest of the party somewhere.
"Do you think AJ will die?" I asked Admiral after a brief moment of silence.
He took a deep breath and sat closer to me before trying to decide on how to respond.
But, I no longer needed an answer from him because I understood what he thought from the way he reacted.
"...it'll be okay, Lazor," Admiral told me.
I really wanted to believe it, so I closed my eyes and tried to engrave his words inside my head. However, just like that, I heard Chikorita's voice tell me "the end is coming" and I freaked out again.
It was like a bad omen of some sort—as if my mind was trying to forewarn me of something. I wish I paid attention to it more, but I didn't. Instead, I tried to find comfort in Admiral's voice and words.
"Did you know that in my family, I was known as VV?" Admiral told me. I think he was trying to distract me from my thoughts. I think he was trying to protect me the only ways he understood how: by teaching me to move along.
"...why?" I asked him.
"Because I was the fifth born of the fifth generation in my family tree," Admiral said to me with a smile.
I laughed because it was actually quite interesting.
A little while after, AJ returned with only an egg in his hands. Everyone else was gone, and I didn't understand. Nothing but negative thoughts managed to process itself in my head. I couldn't hear Admiral speak to me anymore. All I heard was Chikorita's voice, in a taunting manner, telling me that "the end is coming."
I wanted to ask my master "why?"
Did they do something wrong?
Did he abandon them?
...will he do the same to me?
--; March 6th, 2014
Welp. I hope you guys like the part two.
Yup. I attempted to foreshadow Admiral's eventual release. How'd I do? :D
Anyways, please look forward to part three and, once again, thank you to TVTropes.org for the Recap page and Pureownege75 for their reddit post.
Also, guys, check out kiyokon on tumblr~ She (I think it's a she because of her tumblr icon...so I hope I'm right...and if I'm wrong, I'm so sorry!) makes incredible fanart for TPP, including one piece that inspired the whole Admiral and Lazorgator father-son relationship for me.
So yeah~
Thursday, March 6, 2014
"Unrelated Matters"
I watched her grow up
and I watched her leave.
I wonder if she knew
she became the death of me.
--; January 8th, 2014
I wrote this in dedication to someone who used to be in my life, but is no longer in it anymore.
She broke my heart when she left and I haven't forgotten about the heartbreak since.
I think a lot of us can related to the feeling of being left, even when we think we'd never be left behind.
The title was meant to be a contradiction, because obviously, this is a matter that is very important and holds a crapload of significance.
and I watched her leave.
I wonder if she knew
she became the death of me.
--; January 8th, 2014
I wrote this in dedication to someone who used to be in my life, but is no longer in it anymore.
She broke my heart when she left and I haven't forgotten about the heartbreak since.
I think a lot of us can related to the feeling of being left, even when we think we'd never be left behind.
The title was meant to be a contradiction, because obviously, this is a matter that is very important and holds a crapload of significance.
Twitch Plays Pokemon Crystal: Lazorgator's Recap Story, Part 1
Honestly, I don't know what it is that I'm here for. When I first met AJ, he was a little bit crazy to me. He chose me, but I'm not sure he really meant to choose me. However, I was grateful. He chose me and because of that, he expanded my world. I met many people and befriended many pokemon.
AJ was undoubtedly a good kid. He was my master and still is—and forever will be. My first and only master. His methods of training me were a little unorthodox in my opinion. We attempted to battle a wild Pidgey once and for some reason—even though I knew I could have taken it down with a tackle or two—AJ commanded me to use leer so many times, I actually lost count. My eyes hurt a lot afterwards, and it felt like everything was glowing in red—red...just so much red.
We met an old companion of mine when we were heading to a town that had a sweet aroma of Sakura trees. It was the first time I saw the flowers in bloom. Previously, Elm—the man who introduced me to my master—only took me through this town once to meet a man by the name of Oak. I remembered the scent from way back then—when I was truly just a little baby—and it seemed to be fated that I'd meet Chikorita back here again. However, we were enemies and her master stole her away from Elm. Upon her defeat, I tried to talk to her and ask what had happened, but she glared at me and told me "the end is coming."
I didn't understand back then, and quite frankly, I still don't quite understand now.
A little further into our journey, AJ and I became acquainted with Brian, a Pidgey who seemed determined to make a path open for himself. It seems that he grew up having many tell him he'd never amount to the greatness of Bird Jesus. I didn't know who he was at first, but Brian took the time to walk me through the story of adventure of the great Bird Jesus. I was left in awe and shock—the incredible Pidgeot seemed to have gone through a great number of trials in order to revive his god: the Holy Helix, Omanyte.
Not long after, AJ had two more friends to introduce me to. One was a Sentret whom we considered our protector. We dubbed him "Admiral", and for much of our journey, he helped guide us along. With his mighty sword, he cut down obstacles one after another—quickly becoming my idol and instructor.
After the introduction of Admiral, we met Oxxy Ozzworm the Caterpie. She had a weird sense of fashion, always choosing to wear these odd sort of circular shades over her eyes.
By the time I realized it, it was no longer just AJ and I. We had three other companions who tried their best to support us—to support AJ. It seemed that AJ was ill. Many times, he would stop in his tracks and cry out about the voices that screamed in his head. My master—our master—was on the verge of insanity and I was afraid that I would lose him.
We, the party, tried to ease AJ's mind. We helped to guide him to Violet City, a city known for the famous Sprout Tower training spot and the Violet City Gym. Admiral was the one who did most of the guiding. He was very knowledgable about this region and knew things I would never think of knowing about. It seemed that back in the days, he worked as a scout for his gang and had to learn to collect information very quickly for the benefit of his team.
It was an easy victory for us at Violet City Gym. We obtained the Zephyr badge for our master but I don't think AJ really noticed the badge or the victory. Instead, as if something was calling him there, he led us to an eerie place known as the Ruins of Alph.
Strange creatures infested the ruins and they frightened us all—except for Admiral. He stood tall on his tail and led us to safety, and in our journey of terror, we welcomed a baby into the world: Prince Omelette, a Togepi of immeasurable strength.
I never forgot about the moments in the ruins, though. My master hardly slept a wink after the incident at Alph, and sometimes even neglected to acknowledge the existence of the party—save for me. AJ, when we wandered around the routes at night, always pat me on the head and smiled. I think he wanted me to get stronger, but I didn't understand what I would ever need the strength for.
Somehow, one night, I remembered the dark tone of Chikorita's voice as she told me "the end is coming" and I became so frightened that I went to Admiral for guidance.
Admiral heard my fears and nodded, even though he didn't have much of anything to say. My rant woke up Prince Omelette who burst into tears because he was exhausted from the lack of rest. Admiral quietly walked over to Prince and cradled him in his arms, and I saw the tears subside from Prince's eyes.
"You're amazing," I said.
"Why do you say that?" Admiral asked me. He glanced over at me and I noticed the reflection of the campfire burning in his eyes—but it was a kind fire...a gentle one.
"...you just are," I said.
Admiral laughed at me, very quietly, and pat my head. He said, "you're amazing yourself, Lazor."
"...do you really think so?" I asked.
"Yes. I know so," he said before placing Prince back down near AJ's resting body.
This was the first night we spent resting in a long time and I never realized how beautiful silence was until now.
As if he read my mind, Admiral walked over to me and placed his arm over my shoulder. "Look at the beautiful stars," he said.
And I did. And they were, like he said, absolutely beautiful.
"Have a good rest, Lazor. Who knows when you will be able to rest like this again?" Admiral smiled at me as he guided me to AJ's quiet body.
"...what about you?" I asked him.
"A leader must always watch out for his teammates, Lazor. Remember that well. You will be a leader someday, too," Admiral told me.
I never knew my father. Neither did Chikorita nor Cyndaquil. Not a single one of us knew who our parents were. I remembered coming into the world alone and I cried until I heard the voices of Chikorita and Cyndaquil somewhere else. We introduced ourselves—actually, I think it was more like Chikorita introduced herself to me and dragged Cyndaquil into the introduction.
"We're orphans, just like you, Totodile," she said to me.
"...what's...an orphan?" I asked.
"It means our parents didn't want us," Cyndaquil quickly said.
"...didn't...want...us?" I repeated.
"Cyndaquil! What are you doing? He's just a little baby," Chikorita scolded him.
I didn't really hear their conversation though. It was as though the words swallowed me whole. I wasn't wanted...that's why I was born into the world cold, and alone.
"Listen, Totodile. It's true. Our parents...they didn't want us. But, Elm here did. He found us before he even knew who we were and took us in. He told us that we will be loved and cared for one day very soon, because he arranged for a few young trainers to come and adopt us. So...just because we weren't wanted by a few people doesn't mean we weren't wanted at all." Chikorita placed one of her forelegs on my shoulder and pat it. She looked at me a warm kind of sympathy and I felt the kindness of the world for the first time through this simple interaction.
In amidst of my thought, I heard Admiral call out to me.
"Lazor. Are you okay?" Admiral asked, his voice sounded very concerned.
"...yes, I'm fine, Admiral," I nodded. "I think...I think I will go to sleep." I found my place near AJ's heart and cuddled beside my master's body.
"Sleep well, Lazor," Admiral said while patting me to sleep.
I never knew my father. But...I knew Admiral...and he was the best father I never had.
"Hey, Admiral?" I called out to him, sleepily.
"Yeah?" he responded.
"...I hope...that one day...when I'm all grown up...I become like you. Strong and admirable," I told him.
It might've been the fact that I was tired or even just the red-orange burn that came from the campfire, but I thought I saw Admiral's eyes become glazed like he was tearing up when he said "thank you" to me that night.
When morning came, AJ introduced us to Wooper Goldberg, a male amphibious creature who looked too pretty to be a boy. In our introductions, he told us to call him "BK" in favor of the name our master gave him. We all had a nice laugh at the incident and I felt calm for a while—calm and content.
Then, we met Chikorita and her master, a red-haired boy named Silver. She seemed angrier than she was the last time, and after their defeat, I tried to talk to her again.
She used her last ounce of energy to shoot sharp leaves my way before completely fainting.
I asked her if she was happy with her new master.
I don't think she was.
--; March 6th, 2014
So uhh...yeah. What can I say? The fanart for TPPC gave me a case of the major feels.
This is part one. I'll be working on a part two.
I'm actually quite happy with how everything turned out.
I don't know 100% the story, so if I got the names wrong, leave a comment and let me know. A lot of this came from TVTropes' Recap page for TPPC—so thank you TVTropes.org! I also found information from http://www.reddit.com/r/twitchplayspokemon/wiki/historyoftpp_gen2, so thank you reddit user Pureownege75.
I hope you enjoyed my fanfiction.
I'm really excited to write about Admiral and Prince Omelette's release scene, so, LOOK FORWARD TO IT! Hopefully it can give you a lot of feels, LOOOL.
AJ was undoubtedly a good kid. He was my master and still is—and forever will be. My first and only master. His methods of training me were a little unorthodox in my opinion. We attempted to battle a wild Pidgey once and for some reason—even though I knew I could have taken it down with a tackle or two—AJ commanded me to use leer so many times, I actually lost count. My eyes hurt a lot afterwards, and it felt like everything was glowing in red—red...just so much red.
We met an old companion of mine when we were heading to a town that had a sweet aroma of Sakura trees. It was the first time I saw the flowers in bloom. Previously, Elm—the man who introduced me to my master—only took me through this town once to meet a man by the name of Oak. I remembered the scent from way back then—when I was truly just a little baby—and it seemed to be fated that I'd meet Chikorita back here again. However, we were enemies and her master stole her away from Elm. Upon her defeat, I tried to talk to her and ask what had happened, but she glared at me and told me "the end is coming."
I didn't understand back then, and quite frankly, I still don't quite understand now.
A little further into our journey, AJ and I became acquainted with Brian, a Pidgey who seemed determined to make a path open for himself. It seems that he grew up having many tell him he'd never amount to the greatness of Bird Jesus. I didn't know who he was at first, but Brian took the time to walk me through the story of adventure of the great Bird Jesus. I was left in awe and shock—the incredible Pidgeot seemed to have gone through a great number of trials in order to revive his god: the Holy Helix, Omanyte.
Not long after, AJ had two more friends to introduce me to. One was a Sentret whom we considered our protector. We dubbed him "Admiral", and for much of our journey, he helped guide us along. With his mighty sword, he cut down obstacles one after another—quickly becoming my idol and instructor.
After the introduction of Admiral, we met Oxxy Ozzworm the Caterpie. She had a weird sense of fashion, always choosing to wear these odd sort of circular shades over her eyes.
By the time I realized it, it was no longer just AJ and I. We had three other companions who tried their best to support us—to support AJ. It seemed that AJ was ill. Many times, he would stop in his tracks and cry out about the voices that screamed in his head. My master—our master—was on the verge of insanity and I was afraid that I would lose him.
We, the party, tried to ease AJ's mind. We helped to guide him to Violet City, a city known for the famous Sprout Tower training spot and the Violet City Gym. Admiral was the one who did most of the guiding. He was very knowledgable about this region and knew things I would never think of knowing about. It seemed that back in the days, he worked as a scout for his gang and had to learn to collect information very quickly for the benefit of his team.
It was an easy victory for us at Violet City Gym. We obtained the Zephyr badge for our master but I don't think AJ really noticed the badge or the victory. Instead, as if something was calling him there, he led us to an eerie place known as the Ruins of Alph.
Strange creatures infested the ruins and they frightened us all—except for Admiral. He stood tall on his tail and led us to safety, and in our journey of terror, we welcomed a baby into the world: Prince Omelette, a Togepi of immeasurable strength.
I never forgot about the moments in the ruins, though. My master hardly slept a wink after the incident at Alph, and sometimes even neglected to acknowledge the existence of the party—save for me. AJ, when we wandered around the routes at night, always pat me on the head and smiled. I think he wanted me to get stronger, but I didn't understand what I would ever need the strength for.
Somehow, one night, I remembered the dark tone of Chikorita's voice as she told me "the end is coming" and I became so frightened that I went to Admiral for guidance.
Admiral heard my fears and nodded, even though he didn't have much of anything to say. My rant woke up Prince Omelette who burst into tears because he was exhausted from the lack of rest. Admiral quietly walked over to Prince and cradled him in his arms, and I saw the tears subside from Prince's eyes.
"You're amazing," I said.
"Why do you say that?" Admiral asked me. He glanced over at me and I noticed the reflection of the campfire burning in his eyes—but it was a kind fire...a gentle one.
"...you just are," I said.
Admiral laughed at me, very quietly, and pat my head. He said, "you're amazing yourself, Lazor."
"...do you really think so?" I asked.
"Yes. I know so," he said before placing Prince back down near AJ's resting body.
This was the first night we spent resting in a long time and I never realized how beautiful silence was until now.
As if he read my mind, Admiral walked over to me and placed his arm over my shoulder. "Look at the beautiful stars," he said.
And I did. And they were, like he said, absolutely beautiful.
"Have a good rest, Lazor. Who knows when you will be able to rest like this again?" Admiral smiled at me as he guided me to AJ's quiet body.
"...what about you?" I asked him.
"A leader must always watch out for his teammates, Lazor. Remember that well. You will be a leader someday, too," Admiral told me.
I never knew my father. Neither did Chikorita nor Cyndaquil. Not a single one of us knew who our parents were. I remembered coming into the world alone and I cried until I heard the voices of Chikorita and Cyndaquil somewhere else. We introduced ourselves—actually, I think it was more like Chikorita introduced herself to me and dragged Cyndaquil into the introduction.
"We're orphans, just like you, Totodile," she said to me.
"...what's...an orphan?" I asked.
"It means our parents didn't want us," Cyndaquil quickly said.
"...didn't...want...us?" I repeated.
"Cyndaquil! What are you doing? He's just a little baby," Chikorita scolded him.
I didn't really hear their conversation though. It was as though the words swallowed me whole. I wasn't wanted...that's why I was born into the world cold, and alone.
"Listen, Totodile. It's true. Our parents...they didn't want us. But, Elm here did. He found us before he even knew who we were and took us in. He told us that we will be loved and cared for one day very soon, because he arranged for a few young trainers to come and adopt us. So...just because we weren't wanted by a few people doesn't mean we weren't wanted at all." Chikorita placed one of her forelegs on my shoulder and pat it. She looked at me a warm kind of sympathy and I felt the kindness of the world for the first time through this simple interaction.
In amidst of my thought, I heard Admiral call out to me.
"Lazor. Are you okay?" Admiral asked, his voice sounded very concerned.
"...yes, I'm fine, Admiral," I nodded. "I think...I think I will go to sleep." I found my place near AJ's heart and cuddled beside my master's body.
"Sleep well, Lazor," Admiral said while patting me to sleep.
I never knew my father. But...I knew Admiral...and he was the best father I never had.
"Hey, Admiral?" I called out to him, sleepily.
"Yeah?" he responded.
"...I hope...that one day...when I'm all grown up...I become like you. Strong and admirable," I told him.
It might've been the fact that I was tired or even just the red-orange burn that came from the campfire, but I thought I saw Admiral's eyes become glazed like he was tearing up when he said "thank you" to me that night.
When morning came, AJ introduced us to Wooper Goldberg, a male amphibious creature who looked too pretty to be a boy. In our introductions, he told us to call him "BK" in favor of the name our master gave him. We all had a nice laugh at the incident and I felt calm for a while—calm and content.
Then, we met Chikorita and her master, a red-haired boy named Silver. She seemed angrier than she was the last time, and after their defeat, I tried to talk to her again.
She used her last ounce of energy to shoot sharp leaves my way before completely fainting.
I asked her if she was happy with her new master.
I don't think she was.
--; March 6th, 2014
So uhh...yeah. What can I say? The fanart for TPPC gave me a case of the major feels.
This is part one. I'll be working on a part two.
I'm actually quite happy with how everything turned out.
I don't know 100% the story, so if I got the names wrong, leave a comment and let me know. A lot of this came from TVTropes' Recap page for TPPC—so thank you TVTropes.org! I also found information from http://www.reddit.com/r/twitchplayspokemon/wiki/historyoftpp_gen2, so thank you reddit user Pureownege75.
I hope you enjoyed my fanfiction.
I'm really excited to write about Admiral and Prince Omelette's release scene, so, LOOK FORWARD TO IT! Hopefully it can give you a lot of feels, LOOOL.
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Salvaged
There was a time in my life where the sun always shined, but it was dark. It was dark from all the words at loss and all the loss of love. So, my world was blind, and no one understood the meaning of find.
What was there left to find? Nothing can be seen in darkness because darkness veiled everything. Yet, we tried. We tried with all our might to find light. We were a colony of people who were shunned away by the sun and had to live our lives completely blind.
One night, a star past by and caused a commotion in the hearts of everyone who witnessed it. Here we stood, a colony of the blinded, gazing at the glorious bright star. We could finally see; our lives no longer stood in darkness because light was inching closer. It was our salvation. This was our salvation.
——♥;
“Brandon!” a voice of a female called forth.
My head spun around and I saw a running figure of a goddess. Her hair glowed with a spark and I was left electrified in my steps. She had the eyes of the sun; such bright radiance rendered me blind.
“I heard you are the seeker,” the beauty said to me. Slow, heavy breaths were drawn from her and it was obvious she had been out of breath.
“Seeker I am, milady. How may this seeker help such a beaut?” My hand reached out for hers and I gave it a gentle touch with my lips.
“…uhh,” the beauty began to say. It might’ve been my ego, but I could’ve sworn she was left speechless and in awe.
As I flashed my best smile, I couldn’t help but look at her necklace. I had seen it before, but I could not remember where.
“Just where are you staring at?” the gentle voice said as it grew cold and vicious.
Looking up very quickly, I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment. “Oh, uh, I wasn’t looking at anything. I mean, I was looking at something, but it wasn’t you. I mean, it was you, but it wasn’t you you.” My voice cracked a few times and I suddenly heard her giggle.
“They never told me that the seeker was quick to embarrass,” she commented. A hand was brought up to her lips and I saw her smile as she giggled. Her brilliant eyes closed as her lips curved and a melodious sound came from her mouth.
“If it isn’t too rude to ask, may this seeker acquire your name?” I managed to say before I lost my nerve to speak again.
“I am Isabella Locke. My father owns land just north of this village and I came here with a task for you to complete,” Isabella said to me. Her eyes never strayed away from mine and it had me wondering why.
“You’re rather cogent, Miss Isabella,” I said to her with my most powerful gaze.
“Indeed I am, Sir Brandon. Now, will you help me to ascertain this little question I have or will I need to travel elsewhere for another seeker?” Isabella questioned me.
I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was testing me. There was a hinting somewhere that made me think the real task would not be given to me for a while.
“Well?” she asked. A little irritation could be heard in her tone. I could tell she was rather spoiled.
“If you let go of your supercilious attitude, perhaps I will help you with your minute dilemma,” I told her as I began to walk away. I didn’t care for the way she spoke to me, and I soon realized that she looked at me as though I were property.
“Wait. Hold on,” she began as she ran to stop me. Her face soon stood a mere three inches from mine and I was a little breathless. She really was quite the beauty. “I need your help. Will you help me?”
Stepping back and removing my hat from my head, I bowed down towards her. “Why, of course milady. What sort of lad would ignore such a damsel in distress?”
“My task is simple: find my father,” she commanded.
“Do you understand how this system works? I cannot simply make things seen by my eyes. I need a piece of his property, something valuable,” I told her.
“Valuable?” she reiterated, a little confused. It took a few minutes, but her hands soon reached behind her neck and the necklace I had been staring at came off. “Will this do? It was given to my mother by my father. It was his treasure and he thought it would keep her protected before she passed away.”
“An heirloom would most certainly do,” I explained to her as I took the necklace. “However, I need to know the reasons behind why you have it.”
“My mother bequeathed it to me, for safe keeping under my father’s absence,” she explained. The radiance in her eyes gleamed and an air of sadness filled our atmosphere. It was a difficult topic for her to speak about. I understood that much.
“I will help you; give me until sunset and I will have a map drawn for you,” I told her.
“Wait, a map? You won’t be going with me?” she questioned as her eyebrow rose.
“Of course not. It’s not my job. I am a seeker, not a warrior. If you need men, go look for someone in the taverns. I’m sure you could find some very willing to help out a young beauty,” I explained to her.
“But you don’t understand, I need you!” she begged as her arms reached out toward me.
May the stars please be witness to what had happened: she just said that she needed me. Clearing my throat as calmly as I could manage to, I met her gaze and I realized my attainment. “Why must I be affiliated with you more than I have to be?”
“Because, you’re the only one I can go to for this. You’re the only one my mother trusted. She told me to find you. She said you would know who I was.” Isabella had such desperation in her eyes and voice, it was nearly heartbreaking.
“…who was your mother?” I asked, finally giving in.
“Melissa Harte was her name before my father,” she said to me.
I froze again. Melissa Harte. She was the woman whom my parents esteemed with the highest level of grace. “I will accompany you.”
The sun rose with her joy as she leapt into the air and hugged me. Her eyes were powerful. They knew how to manipulate those who stared into them. They were an abyss of magic.
——♥;
“What happened to your father?” I asked as we ventured into the forest.
“My father left for a meeting with a friend, but it has been weeks since we last heard from him,” she said to me.
“I see. And your mother, how did she pass away?”
I heard tracks stop following me as I continued to walk. This silence made me pause and turn around. Isabella had eyes that welled up with tears and that invulnerable guise she put up immediately dispersed. A part of me wanted to grab her and place her in my arms. I wished to tell her that it was okay, but that was not my place, and this was not the time for bonding moments. Our time was finite, and it was quickly running out.
“My mother…she died of disease…,” Isabella began. She wiped away her tears and spoke again, “my father left looking for a panacea, but according to the doctors, it was already too late.”
“Oh.”
“And what of yours?” she asked me as she picked up her pace and began to walk beside me.
“My father died in war, and my mother was killed by a madman rampaging through our town. We tried for her justice, but the judge said that the crime was venial. We have been looking for her murderer ever since, my brother and I.”
“…brother? I never heard of a brother,” she said.
“Because it's not the business of the public’s,” I told her, quickly dismissing the topic.
“…oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you,” she quietly apologized.
I couldn’t help but to chuckle when she apologized. “No. It’s quite alright, really. It should be me apologizing to you for my intrusion of your private matters.”
——♥;
As the nights passed by, I realized we were nearing the path of where Isabella’s father was. He had not moved from where he was, adding concern to my mind. I did not tell her though, lest it be the case that I was wrong.
“How much further?” she asked me with a tired voice. Sweat drenched her body, and dirt painted her clothes, yet she still looked so radiant.
“Only a few stretches more,” I told her, attempting to keep eye contact with the road in front of me and not with her.
“Is something the matter?” Isabella’s voice of concern enveloped my thoughts.
“…no. Nothing is the matter.” How could I have not realized it until now? All those subtle signs in the beginning that grew into things that made my heart pound meant one thing: I had fallen for her.
“You won’t look at me anymore, Brandon,” she mentioned.
Those words stung my chest and I felt my footsteps stop as hers continued to stride forward. “…why do you say that?”
“People can tell when you refuse to look them in the eye. We might not all be seekers, but we are not blind.” With a soft voice, Isabella’s words haunted my mind like an echo. She could tell that something was wrong. Who am I to hide it anymore?
“…the truth is—” I began to say before Isabella stopped in her tracks in horror.
“Father?!” she cried aloud as she quickly kneeled before the tired old man who face was so bloodied he could not be distinguished from a beast.
There was the sound of a subtle breaths being drawn from the old man with graying hairlines. It was the sound of life and the sound of relief.
“He’s alive, Isabella. He’s alive,” I told her as I began to walk towards him. There was a hint of sadness in my chest because it meant the journey was over. I realized things too late.
My sadness was cut short when I realized something on the neck of her father. It was the same necklace Isabella had given to me, and suddenly a million images ran across my mind. I finally connected all the pieces together. He was the madman who rampaged through my village, leaving my mother dead. My aching heart became full of fury as I finally saw my ticket towards vengeance.
“…move aside, Isabella…,” I told her as I got ready to draw my sword.
I wonder if the look in my eyes scared Isabella because when she looked up at me, she looked up in horror.
“…what are you going to do?” she asked in fear.
“…he killed my mother,” I told her, “what do you suppose I do for justice?”
With eyes widening so much, she crawled over towards her father’s body and laid herself on top of the blood and dirt. “No. You cannot.
“Move aside, girl.” My hand reached for my sword’s handle and I drew my sword from its sheath. “It’s unfortunate that you forced me to come with you. Your father might have still had a chance at being alive had you gotten someone from the taverns.”
“…you will not harm my father. What justice you must obtain, please gain it through me,” I heard her say as she slowly raised her head to look at me.
This was where I was left completely struck. My heart tore itself apart in seconds when I saw the look on her face, her fearing face. I didn’t see the pain or the tears that should’ve been so obvious to my eyes. How had I grown so blind even though I claimed to have the eyes of a god? It took a moment, but I withdrew my sword and tossed her back the necklace I used to guide us to the madman. “If I come across him once more, his life will end with my sword.”
——♥;
There was a time where the sun would always shine and people managed to see past the glare. We were no longer blind, yet we became unable to do much with our sight. This sense was completely new to us so we did not know what to do with it. Confusion struck through and people went mad when day became too bright. The glare was something we could no longer ignore, and all we could do was stare at the bright sun that never seemed to set. It drove many towards the path of insanity, and few came back with their minds intact. It was the punishment left for us, for not understanding why we had to value the darkness.
--; November 4th, 2012
I wrote this for some reason...a few things in this story pay respect to The Legend of the Seeker (AKA, The Sword of Truth series).
Anyways...yup. It was supposed to be apart of a two-part series, but I never got to making the part two.
I attempted to use age-old words and stuff (but to be honest, I pretty much failed because I have no real idea what certain words mean and stuff).
What was there left to find? Nothing can be seen in darkness because darkness veiled everything. Yet, we tried. We tried with all our might to find light. We were a colony of people who were shunned away by the sun and had to live our lives completely blind.
One night, a star past by and caused a commotion in the hearts of everyone who witnessed it. Here we stood, a colony of the blinded, gazing at the glorious bright star. We could finally see; our lives no longer stood in darkness because light was inching closer. It was our salvation. This was our salvation.
——♥;
“Brandon!” a voice of a female called forth.
My head spun around and I saw a running figure of a goddess. Her hair glowed with a spark and I was left electrified in my steps. She had the eyes of the sun; such bright radiance rendered me blind.
“I heard you are the seeker,” the beauty said to me. Slow, heavy breaths were drawn from her and it was obvious she had been out of breath.
“Seeker I am, milady. How may this seeker help such a beaut?” My hand reached out for hers and I gave it a gentle touch with my lips.
“…uhh,” the beauty began to say. It might’ve been my ego, but I could’ve sworn she was left speechless and in awe.
As I flashed my best smile, I couldn’t help but look at her necklace. I had seen it before, but I could not remember where.
“Just where are you staring at?” the gentle voice said as it grew cold and vicious.
Looking up very quickly, I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment. “Oh, uh, I wasn’t looking at anything. I mean, I was looking at something, but it wasn’t you. I mean, it was you, but it wasn’t you you.” My voice cracked a few times and I suddenly heard her giggle.
“They never told me that the seeker was quick to embarrass,” she commented. A hand was brought up to her lips and I saw her smile as she giggled. Her brilliant eyes closed as her lips curved and a melodious sound came from her mouth.
“If it isn’t too rude to ask, may this seeker acquire your name?” I managed to say before I lost my nerve to speak again.
“I am Isabella Locke. My father owns land just north of this village and I came here with a task for you to complete,” Isabella said to me. Her eyes never strayed away from mine and it had me wondering why.
“You’re rather cogent, Miss Isabella,” I said to her with my most powerful gaze.
“Indeed I am, Sir Brandon. Now, will you help me to ascertain this little question I have or will I need to travel elsewhere for another seeker?” Isabella questioned me.
I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was testing me. There was a hinting somewhere that made me think the real task would not be given to me for a while.
“Well?” she asked. A little irritation could be heard in her tone. I could tell she was rather spoiled.
“If you let go of your supercilious attitude, perhaps I will help you with your minute dilemma,” I told her as I began to walk away. I didn’t care for the way she spoke to me, and I soon realized that she looked at me as though I were property.
“Wait. Hold on,” she began as she ran to stop me. Her face soon stood a mere three inches from mine and I was a little breathless. She really was quite the beauty. “I need your help. Will you help me?”
Stepping back and removing my hat from my head, I bowed down towards her. “Why, of course milady. What sort of lad would ignore such a damsel in distress?”
“My task is simple: find my father,” she commanded.
“Do you understand how this system works? I cannot simply make things seen by my eyes. I need a piece of his property, something valuable,” I told her.
“Valuable?” she reiterated, a little confused. It took a few minutes, but her hands soon reached behind her neck and the necklace I had been staring at came off. “Will this do? It was given to my mother by my father. It was his treasure and he thought it would keep her protected before she passed away.”
“An heirloom would most certainly do,” I explained to her as I took the necklace. “However, I need to know the reasons behind why you have it.”
“My mother bequeathed it to me, for safe keeping under my father’s absence,” she explained. The radiance in her eyes gleamed and an air of sadness filled our atmosphere. It was a difficult topic for her to speak about. I understood that much.
“I will help you; give me until sunset and I will have a map drawn for you,” I told her.
“Wait, a map? You won’t be going with me?” she questioned as her eyebrow rose.
“Of course not. It’s not my job. I am a seeker, not a warrior. If you need men, go look for someone in the taverns. I’m sure you could find some very willing to help out a young beauty,” I explained to her.
“But you don’t understand, I need you!” she begged as her arms reached out toward me.
May the stars please be witness to what had happened: she just said that she needed me. Clearing my throat as calmly as I could manage to, I met her gaze and I realized my attainment. “Why must I be affiliated with you more than I have to be?”
“Because, you’re the only one I can go to for this. You’re the only one my mother trusted. She told me to find you. She said you would know who I was.” Isabella had such desperation in her eyes and voice, it was nearly heartbreaking.
“…who was your mother?” I asked, finally giving in.
“Melissa Harte was her name before my father,” she said to me.
I froze again. Melissa Harte. She was the woman whom my parents esteemed with the highest level of grace. “I will accompany you.”
The sun rose with her joy as she leapt into the air and hugged me. Her eyes were powerful. They knew how to manipulate those who stared into them. They were an abyss of magic.
——♥;
“What happened to your father?” I asked as we ventured into the forest.
“My father left for a meeting with a friend, but it has been weeks since we last heard from him,” she said to me.
“I see. And your mother, how did she pass away?”
I heard tracks stop following me as I continued to walk. This silence made me pause and turn around. Isabella had eyes that welled up with tears and that invulnerable guise she put up immediately dispersed. A part of me wanted to grab her and place her in my arms. I wished to tell her that it was okay, but that was not my place, and this was not the time for bonding moments. Our time was finite, and it was quickly running out.
“My mother…she died of disease…,” Isabella began. She wiped away her tears and spoke again, “my father left looking for a panacea, but according to the doctors, it was already too late.”
“Oh.”
“And what of yours?” she asked me as she picked up her pace and began to walk beside me.
“My father died in war, and my mother was killed by a madman rampaging through our town. We tried for her justice, but the judge said that the crime was venial. We have been looking for her murderer ever since, my brother and I.”
“…brother? I never heard of a brother,” she said.
“Because it's not the business of the public’s,” I told her, quickly dismissing the topic.
“…oh. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you,” she quietly apologized.
I couldn’t help but to chuckle when she apologized. “No. It’s quite alright, really. It should be me apologizing to you for my intrusion of your private matters.”
——♥;
As the nights passed by, I realized we were nearing the path of where Isabella’s father was. He had not moved from where he was, adding concern to my mind. I did not tell her though, lest it be the case that I was wrong.
“How much further?” she asked me with a tired voice. Sweat drenched her body, and dirt painted her clothes, yet she still looked so radiant.
“Only a few stretches more,” I told her, attempting to keep eye contact with the road in front of me and not with her.
“Is something the matter?” Isabella’s voice of concern enveloped my thoughts.
“…no. Nothing is the matter.” How could I have not realized it until now? All those subtle signs in the beginning that grew into things that made my heart pound meant one thing: I had fallen for her.
“You won’t look at me anymore, Brandon,” she mentioned.
Those words stung my chest and I felt my footsteps stop as hers continued to stride forward. “…why do you say that?”
“People can tell when you refuse to look them in the eye. We might not all be seekers, but we are not blind.” With a soft voice, Isabella’s words haunted my mind like an echo. She could tell that something was wrong. Who am I to hide it anymore?
“…the truth is—” I began to say before Isabella stopped in her tracks in horror.
“Father?!” she cried aloud as she quickly kneeled before the tired old man who face was so bloodied he could not be distinguished from a beast.
There was the sound of a subtle breaths being drawn from the old man with graying hairlines. It was the sound of life and the sound of relief.
“He’s alive, Isabella. He’s alive,” I told her as I began to walk towards him. There was a hint of sadness in my chest because it meant the journey was over. I realized things too late.
My sadness was cut short when I realized something on the neck of her father. It was the same necklace Isabella had given to me, and suddenly a million images ran across my mind. I finally connected all the pieces together. He was the madman who rampaged through my village, leaving my mother dead. My aching heart became full of fury as I finally saw my ticket towards vengeance.
“…move aside, Isabella…,” I told her as I got ready to draw my sword.
I wonder if the look in my eyes scared Isabella because when she looked up at me, she looked up in horror.
“…what are you going to do?” she asked in fear.
“…he killed my mother,” I told her, “what do you suppose I do for justice?”
With eyes widening so much, she crawled over towards her father’s body and laid herself on top of the blood and dirt. “No. You cannot.
“Move aside, girl.” My hand reached for my sword’s handle and I drew my sword from its sheath. “It’s unfortunate that you forced me to come with you. Your father might have still had a chance at being alive had you gotten someone from the taverns.”
“…you will not harm my father. What justice you must obtain, please gain it through me,” I heard her say as she slowly raised her head to look at me.
This was where I was left completely struck. My heart tore itself apart in seconds when I saw the look on her face, her fearing face. I didn’t see the pain or the tears that should’ve been so obvious to my eyes. How had I grown so blind even though I claimed to have the eyes of a god? It took a moment, but I withdrew my sword and tossed her back the necklace I used to guide us to the madman. “If I come across him once more, his life will end with my sword.”
——♥;
There was a time where the sun would always shine and people managed to see past the glare. We were no longer blind, yet we became unable to do much with our sight. This sense was completely new to us so we did not know what to do with it. Confusion struck through and people went mad when day became too bright. The glare was something we could no longer ignore, and all we could do was stare at the bright sun that never seemed to set. It drove many towards the path of insanity, and few came back with their minds intact. It was the punishment left for us, for not understanding why we had to value the darkness.
--; November 4th, 2012
I wrote this for some reason...a few things in this story pay respect to The Legend of the Seeker (AKA, The Sword of Truth series).
Anyways...yup. It was supposed to be apart of a two-part series, but I never got to making the part two.
I attempted to use age-old words and stuff (but to be honest, I pretty much failed because I have no real idea what certain words mean and stuff).
Tuesday, March 4, 2014
"I Haven't, Though"
You broke my heart
and it seems
you forgot all about that.
--; January 11th, 2014
I think it's pretty much self-explanatory. Yup.
and it seems
you forgot all about that.
--; January 11th, 2014
I think it's pretty much self-explanatory. Yup.
Monday, March 3, 2014
"The Stars Don't Even Shine"
I asked for a wish
from the stars
that shone
above me.
However, once
I opened my eyes
all the stars
stopped shining
as if to tell me
that I have a wish
that could never
be granted.
--; March 3rd, 2014
from the stars
that shone
above me.
However, once
I opened my eyes
all the stars
stopped shining
as if to tell me
that I have a wish
that could never
be granted.
--; March 3rd, 2014
"All These Used To Be's"
I used to think about you
and the ink explosions that
would flood my paper.
But, I can't think about you
or the ink explosions
that never happen.
Not now. Not anymore.
The difference is time
and time caused the change
between the two of us.
We became a part
of the past
that we never wanted
but had to have
anyways.
and the ink explosions that
would flood my paper.
But, I can't think about you
or the ink explosions
that never happen.
Not now. Not anymore.
The difference is time
and time caused the change
between the two of us.
We became a part
of the past
that we never wanted
but had to have
anyways.
"I Wonder If This Is Living"
How do you explain
to someone
that the reason
you used
to love them
is no longer
reason enough?
Such as
the way their voice
became the
air you needed
to breathe.
How do you
tell them
that you
learned
to live
without them,
when they used
to be
the only way
you knew
to live by?
--; March 3rd, 2014
I don't know why I wrote this. I just did. I haven't been able to write much of anything. Even my last piece was mostly crap. Every word I jot down seems to be wrong. I feel like not one piece of my writing should exist.
The Right to Exist
"Come here, sweetheart," the voice calls out to me.
I turn about my head, searching for the source of this voice. I end up seeing no one around but me—me and a mirror in my room to show me how much of a mess I have become.
"I missed you, you know," the voice calls out again.
This time, I walk around my room. Perhaps, a friend of mine is playing a trick on me. I couldn’t shake the feeling that I knew the voice…like, really knew the voice.
"You won’t find me in plain sight," the voice coos at me.
I feel as though I am being toyed with. Suddenly finding myself in front of the mirror, I look at my reflection and I see a smile smeared across the face that should have been mine.
"Ahh. You’re finally thinking out of the box," the voice says to me—smiling at me so eerily.
Out of shock, I freeze on the spot. Is this some kind of sick joke?
"Of course not. It’s simply me speaking to my dearest sweetheart," the girl in the mirror says. Her voice scares me even though I’ve come to realize that her voice is mine as well.
My hand reaches for my lips, as if trying to draw my mind out the illusion. I am not smiling, and yet the reflection still is. She’s not touching her face; both her hands are on the floor. We are both sitting crossed legged, and I stare at her hair for a while. This girl obviously looks like a complete mess, but why am I so captivated by her beauty? Why can’t I look like that?
"You do. You look this beautiful all of the time," she says to me.
I freeze again. I must have been drugged or something…
"Nope. This is reality—well, as much of a reality as anything could be, anyways." Her smiling still seems bright, yet I can’t help but to be creeped out.
I do not trust her: this girl in the mirror. She must be a liar. She must be a dream. She must be a fraud. She has to be.
"But, I’m real," she calls out to me. "I’m as real as you are. Wanna see?"
I don’t dare answer.
"Look," she begins to say as she reaches for something in her pocket—my pocket. I see her hand revealing a metallic surface shining in the light; it was a razor.
I bought one today after realizing I lost possession of mine last night. The sudden urge to look at my left arm overcame me. Suddenly, I started feeling a searing pain, and liquid trickled over my left arm. I look at the mirror’s reflection, and I see her work. She was using it—my razor—to inflict wounds on her left arm…my arm. I want to open my mouth to scream out “STOP!”, but I can no longer feel my voice. My voice became trapped every time I opened my mouth to speak.
"Do you believe me now?" she asks me as her eyes suddenly change.
She scares me more than ever. Her facial expression hasn’t changed, but I see the change. I see the difference.
The reflection runs her right finger across the wound, and I flinched. I want to grab something to stop the bleeding because I do not want to bleed out. I do not want to die. But I feel frozen. I feel trapped.
"Now, now. Stay calm there, sweetheart. I missed your presence so dearly. Won’t you pay me some more mind?" she taunts.
I don’t know what it is to do now. I am scared. I am so scared.
I want to fight. I want to win. But how do I defeat something I can not even begin to explain? How do I beat someone in the same league as myself? She knows everything, I’m aware of that now. Every piece of knowledge that belongs to me, belongs to her as well. I understand that now. So, how do I fight? How do I win, when I can barely even understand how she came to be so much more powerful than me…even though she is me?
--; May 2nd, 2013
This is supposed to personify the "demon" inside the hearts and minds of those who go through depression. I know a lot of people who don't go through depression don't understand it, but this is what it feels like a lot of the times. You don't realize what you are doing until it's already done and all you're left with are questions as to why you even did it.
And on a complete other note: this is actually written in present tense...huh. I never realized it.
Sunday, March 2, 2014
"Stronger Than the Flames"
If my house burned down,
could I rest my heart
in your mind?
Would you be willing to
provide me with comfort
and protection--
let me know
that you are
my home
and you will never burn
away
like wood to fire
never turn to ash
?
--; January 8th, 2014
I had something to say with this poem, but I decided against it. Maybe I'll edit this sometime later and add what I wanted to say.
could I rest my heart
in your mind?
Would you be willing to
provide me with comfort
and protection--
let me know
that you are
my home
and you will never burn
away
like wood to fire
never turn to ash
?
--; January 8th, 2014
I had something to say with this poem, but I decided against it. Maybe I'll edit this sometime later and add what I wanted to say.
Chapter 2: All Aboard the SS Stern, Part One.
Raymin
Okay. Let's get something straight first: I have a huge fear of heights...Yes. That's right. I admit it. I'm scared of heights. But, I don't mean like the kind of heights where it's like up high. It's sort of weird, but I'm just scared of having my feet being lifted off the floor. Basically, I'm scared of floating.
Oh, wait. Yeah. That works. I'm scared of floating.
Alex is evil. He's full of evil. He's carrying me and refusing to place me down on the floor for the sole reason of keeping me from running. And before you say anything else, I wasn't planning to run...not really. I mean...if I go off course for a little while—just a little bit—would that really count as running off? I don't think so. Therefore, this guy right here is technically kidnapping me. Yup. He's kidnapping me. A kidnapper. Shame, Alex. For shame. I can't believe you've resorted to kidnapping people.
As I suck my teeth at Alex in my head (I didn't actually do it...if I did, who knows what he would have done to me...), I slowly back away from resting my face on his neck. Alex has really pretty features (not that he'd ever admit it). His hair is black, but when the sun shines on it--like it does right now—I can always see stars in the spots that shine. And well, his eyes? His eyes are sort of weird. They're mostly green. If you look really closely, you can see specks of different shades. I like it. When I look at Alex, I feel like I'm staring at the whole entire world—packaged all neatly into the shape of one person.
"Alright, we're here, Ray," Alex whispers into my hair. I feel him kiss my head as he gently places my feet on the ground. To be honest, I sort of like Alex--I think.
"Mhmm," I say to him, as I straighten out my clothes and look at the building in front of us. We're in front of my day-care and I swallow hard.
As the front door opens a little bit, I try to make a turn to start running. But, of course, I can't. Alex is already holding my hand and I can feel my entire body growing a bit warm. I don't really know what the feeling can be called, but I felt it.
"Raymin!" I heard a girl call out to me. It was my sister-in-law, Melissa.
I force a smile on my face and nervously wave hi to her as I try to hide behind Alex's tall figure. Alex is six feet, which is a good five feet taller than me.
"Come out from hiding, Raymin. You know I don't bite," I hear her coo in that voice of hers. "Look, I even got some new dresses for you to try out—and if you like, bring them with you to Kanto."
"...oh...o--okay...," I answer.
Now, look. It's not like I'm scared of Melissa, it's just—she scares me... Yeah, I know. It's confusing. But like, I really like Melissa. She's pretty awesome when she doesn't look at me like a little dress up doll for her to play with. I go to her for advice every now and again (because my feelings really confuse me sometimes) and she usually gives me good advice. But, Melissa...she teases me a lot...and it always makes me feel embarrassed—especially when I'm with both Alex and Kevin (which I am, right now. Or will be, in a moment).
"Come on, Ray. Go with Melissa. You have to go collect your pokemon and PokeDex anyways," Alex tells me.
"...mhmm..."
--;
I'm going to cut the chapter short here.
I started it in present tense speak and honestly, I'm horrible at present tense stories. I've written a lot of things, and only one of them uses present tense. Just one.
ONE.
I'll come back with a part two, in past tense writing form.
But yeah.
Raymin. Crushing. On. Alex.
Ahahahahaha.
I don't even know if they will really be canon.
Saturday, March 1, 2014
"To Each Our Own"
Maybe the flowers
know of a better sun
as they have soaked
up so much light
from the world
in order to exist.
But I have to say,
basking in your
presence
is still the only
sun
to me.
--; January 13th, 2014
A lot of us will go through those moments where others will tell us that the person we are with isn't deserving of us, or that we could do better. My response to that is: how would you know? Maybe we could do better, maybe we can't. However, how could you know? You do not experience the moments I experience. You do not see what I see. You cannot possibly feel everything that I felt for that specific person at the specific time.
"You may only be one person to the world. But you may also be the world to one person." (Anonymous)
know of a better sun
as they have soaked
up so much light
from the world
in order to exist.
But I have to say,
basking in your
presence
is still the only
sun
to me.
--; January 13th, 2014
A lot of us will go through those moments where others will tell us that the person we are with isn't deserving of us, or that we could do better. My response to that is: how would you know? Maybe we could do better, maybe we can't. However, how could you know? You do not experience the moments I experience. You do not see what I see. You cannot possibly feel everything that I felt for that specific person at the specific time.
"You may only be one person to the world. But you may also be the world to one person." (Anonymous)
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